Sleep much?

The answer to that is no.

Wee girlie got up about an hour ago… screaming.

Got her settled and realized. I am not going to settle down any time soon.  So… down here I come.  la la la la laaaaa

Going to the farmers market with the Supreme Sock Goddess this morning.  I think we will skip our swimming lesson as she was up so much tonight.  I have to walk over to the gargantuan toy store sometime to pick up the last of the Christmas gifts… yes, I’m done by October.  Yes, even I think that this is SICK!

Husband is heading to the homestead this afternoon.  I’m staying home with the littles.  I’m not really up for a ‘visit’ with the in-laws.  Now, with the lack of sleep I really know that I am not up for it.

Well, in an hour or two at least the boys will be up.

urg.

Hi there… I’m hiding.

Yup. I’m upstairs in my bedroom.

The financial advisor/investment guy is downstairs talking with the husband.

I am up here.

I do not feel like listening to how much we need to save for the future…

buddy.  I’m not happy with the present.  Can we lay off the future.

But mostly… I’m avoiding blowing a gasket on the guy with the whole… ‘you could get a job’ comments.

Let me send the daycare, second car (and insurance) invoices to you then… Mr. both my wife and I drive luxury SUV’s, build a new home and live in suburban hell (she was our real estate agent…. so I know they have matching Lexus’).

Yeah, reality doesn’t bite his segment of the population.

Truth be told.  I’m not even sure what kind of job I could get.  I mean… seriously?  I have no clue.  And apparently I need to have this figured out shortly… seeing as the kids will all be in school full time in four short years.

shame on me for not figuring this out already.

going to crawl in to bed now.

no title can implore more…

IF you read NOTHING else EVER AGAIN on this blog.

READ THIS.

Especially if you are pregnant or work with pregnant women.  I am totally floored. I am actually speechless.

24 apples down…

Peeled, cored and cut… now sitting in the slow cooker to simmer for the next six hours.

Four more bags to go!

When I said I wanted apples.. I did NOT expect five plastic bags FULL!

If you shall excuse me… I have a bunch of apples to deal with! Friend of midsized boy came by with his mum, so the three of them went off for the afternoon! Wee girlie was dispatched to nap… withoutadiaperthankyouverymuch!

Lets hope I don’t have laundry when she wakes up!

Baaaaaaaaaaa

So the way I figure it… sheep must have an ‘oh my goodness I’m so excited!’ kind of BAA… right?

I just ordered my coveted, yearned for..

WHAT THE HECK?  The air conditioner just came on.  Seriously… it just started up as I was typing!

Anyway.

The yarn I have been drooling over, wanting, planning, stalking!  I ordered it!  And one of her totally AWESOME bags too.

Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I don’t even know when to expect it.  I don’t even care!  I just know that sometime in the next few weeks… I’ll get this wonderful package in the mail.  And it will be MINE MINE MINE!!!!

Oh and I also bought the maple leaf scarf pattern as well.  Trying to figure out the best way to take my ball of Noro Silk Garden Sock yarn and wind it up properly.  Do I take it apart from the outside, or do I start on the inside first?  Do I wind it around my knees, then get out the tinker toys and ball winder?  Or do I just start winding it as I pull out stretches of it? Such questions I have!

I’m going to turn off the air conditioning… granted it was 30 out there today with the humidity!  oh crap.  Add the high humidity to the weather and the half billion zucchini muffins I’m baking at the moment… and there is the answer.  I am such an idiot at times.

Penny

Midsized boy is going through and oral phase… he was putting EVERYTHING in his mouth, toys, coins, pens, markers… everything.

Well, we finally swallowed something about a week ago. In an effort to figure out what he really did swallow I grabbed all kinds of change and demanded what he ’swallowed’. He calls all coins pennies.

It was a penny, thank goodness.

Well this morning… I have a tummy ache.

No, I don’t need to use the toilet! Was the reply to the usual fix-it for tummy aches.

Well, I hauled him and wee girlie home again by 9:15 and sent him upstairs with his water bottle and some toys/books/animals.

Well, guess who had a bowel movement? And all of a sudden wants to join his sister in the living room?

Nuh uh buddy. IF you are good, I’ll allow you downstairs after lunch when your sister has a snooze.

I have one miserable little boy right now.

*UPDATE…. he puked ALL OVER his bed.  Lovely… Just lovely.  I feel sorry for the penguins.

Note to self…

Do not take Extra Strength Tylenol… then sip a Smirnoff Ice while making supper.

The lasagna (to be eaten tomorrow) turned out fine. Supper was more than edible, by my childrens demands for “MORE”.

But I… I have a very red face and oddly enough…

The headache is gone.

who ‘da thunk?

I’m such a cheap inexpensive/thrifty date!

Busy day.

I just spent about an hour holding biggest boy… while he tried to figure out why… WHY?! couldn’t the doctors fix the sickness our neighbour had.

She died this afternoon.

I was at a friends housewarming party. Which was lovely and nice and wonderful… but I’m emotionally and physically exhausted.

We went to the farmers market this morning and then to dance and swimming lessons. WHY wee girlie chose today to be afraid of the water is beyond me! But she did, and we worked through it. If I have to go and show all my flab to the world, she can get in the water with me and sing songs and play games! By the end of the class she was blowing bubbles and giggling so who knows what that was all about. Oh yeah. It was a show… silly kid!

Tomorrow is the potluck luncheon at church. I’m just waiting for my stuff to cool before I shove it in the fridge and go to bed. Making something I can shove in the crock pot at 8 and give it a 15 minute break on the ride to church to plug it back in again.

Going to bed now.

I’m too tired to figure out how we can manage to get to the funeral, this week. Too many funerals. And I refuse to have a category for death… I just plainly refuse.

yet another reason to sob

This article appeared in the paper this morning.

I’ve been wavering between anger at the TRUTH of it… and

sobbing that I can’t be a part of the solution.

My home Province DOES have the crappy track record.  And our cesarean rate is climbing higher and higher.

I’m scared for the future.  I’m scared for wee girlie and if the boys become parents…

Just add this to the angst and such that is screwing with my brain these days.

Apparently he really NEEDED a new bike.

So my father went out and purchased this one… the perfect size for midsized boy.

John Deere bike is still hidden away.  My guess is that biggest boy will be riding it by the spring.

who knew bikes and such were such important things!

two empty homes.

There are two empty homes on my street.  Mine is right between them.

It is depressing.

The one to the south is up for sale, the couple, after 18 years together decided to part ways.  Though they still bring the yappy dog over every afternoon and smoke their dope on the back step.

EVERY. SINGLE. DAY!

ugh.

The other is another story.  I never really ‘liked’ that neighbour.  She didn’t have any sense of humour, she was an ‘out to save the world’ social worker, she just wasn’t the type of person we were all that interested in spending time with.   In June she was diagnosed with Breast Cancer.  In July she had a radical mastectomy.  In August they tried to help control the painful nerve damage that had happened during the surgery. In September, her friends and co-workers have cleared out her home and cleaned it up in the hopes that she will be able to have hospice care.  Should it be safe enough for her to leave the hospital.

Her time on this earth is limited.  Now despite my dislike of some of her quirks and traits… I would have NEVER wished this on her.

I’ve taken midsized boy to visit her on the weekend with another neighbour.  Tonight I hope to take biggest boy for a quick visit.  It is hard to do this, because just last Friday one of the people I knew from school died (cancer of the stomach).  Midsized boy asked me where she was today.  He understands that she isn’t coming back.  But how far that understanding goes?  I’m not sure.

This afternoon he asked if next door neighbour is going to go away forever too.

sob.

All this really hit home when I opened up my favourite québécoise blogger to read her journey through breast cancer in her family and the choices she had to make.  *note check out her etsy shop, I’m making an order this coming week!*

I was sobbing by the end of it.  Didn’t even crack open the dictionary either.  Not that I was in any shape to ‘read the fine print’

Cancer sucks.

Cancer sucks.

Cancer sucks.

And on that note.  I’m going to holler at my ‘cancer doc’ next Tuesday.  I don’t need to live like this for three more years.  Decision time.

WAH…

It is raining outside.

I hate walking with three children in the rain… especially when we have a deadline looming (the school bell).

Bah.

Bane of my existence.

I despise fund raising…

All our family lives outside of the area covered by this.

We have very few friends, and we don’t ask either…

Blah.

I also hate that the school pushes all the great prizes kids win when they sell X amount.  bah.

all is well.

I found a ‘I hate the new firefox, how do I get the old one back’ kind of Q & A.  Reloaded 2.0 and voila there is everything as I left it.

Wee girlie was UP all night.  Not playing, but crying.  Not pleasant.  For any of us involved.

Boys were exhausted and went to sleep just fine.

I had weird dreams all night long, between wee girlie visits.  Like REALLY weird.  I can’t remember if it was me pregnant or someone I was with… but I was being pretty stupid as far as contacting care providers or honesty in what was going on.  I have a niggling feeling of uneasiness.  Most everyone has delivered their babes just fine lately.  Only one person I know left to go in October, and she is going for a vbac with midwives.  I shouldn’t be worried about her… Her last delivery didn’t go as planned, but this one seems to be going well, and she isn’t of the attitude that it will be the same.  Or maybe she is… Hopefully her doula reassures her that ‘different baby, different labour’. Odd what the subconscious throws at you huh?

Well, must get boys dressed and wake up wee girlie… or not.  I might drag her to school in pj’s.  There are some things I just do not mess with.

KILL ME!

I am such a dumba$$

I downloaded the NEW Firefox.

I’ve LOST EVERYTHING!

Seven tries later… I ’seem’ to have the homepage reset.

bookmarking is NOT going well.

I foresee a whole afternoon trying to get everything back.

SOB!

Update.

FIREFOX IS AS EVIL AS MICROSOFT.

I DESPISE Firefox.